I been reading my old dairy for the past few days, I realized that I should never try to forget what happened. Instead, I should remember it, accepted that it happened, and not allow it to haunt me. I realized that this whole time, I been shutting myself off in order to protect myself. I felt resentment and I would do anything to avoid my emotions. While I was reading my entries, it was hard to believe that it even happened in the first place. For one, things have changed so much since then. Other thing was, I can’t believe I had gone through all those problems. I admit, I became strong because of it and at the same time, I saw myself become insecure. The only difference was, the way I handled it. I used to act as if I were too good that way; other guys would be scare to approach me. Then when _____ came back and smash right through my act. I came up with another defense. I was “too busy”, I over piled myself with assignments so I would never have time to meet other people nor get to know them. As I was reading my dairy, I see things differently than how I used to see it however, what I need to realize is that, there was some truth to those words. I shouldn’t tell myself that everything was a lie in order to move on, I need to accept that every word said was real, but realize that it’s over. I need to accept it in order to move on, happily.  I’m over it, that I know. The only problem is, I can’t trust and I don’t want to feel resentment, as if every guy has bad intention. I need to trust myself that I know better and give people a fair chance.