My heart, mind and soul unlock itself when I am vulnerable. My thoughts are in depth and writing is at its best when I’m drowning in my pool of emotions. Suffocated, trapped with no way out… that’s when everything unleashes itself. I haven’t opened myself for a long time. I have been sharing more laughs than tears. I disconnect my soul, my inner self by connecting with others. I traded my emotions for happiness but with my emotions, came with my true self. During this exchange, I realized that I couldn’t truly open myself up to others, for if I do, my emotions will return and happiness will depart. By opening up, it means recalling my emotions and the memories that have created who I am, as of today. I cannot afford someone to fall deep and with my feelings in return. I want to suppress myself, lay low and enjoy myself rather than putting my emotions at risk for impending pain. I have been playing stupid, blending in with the crowd, and pretending I have nothing to offer to avoid someone to see my full potential. Something like putting a smile on my face everyday, masking myself and joking around, gives others the illusion that I’m simple. That’s all I want to be, simple, happy, and free.