I want to give up and walk backwards, it was easier being a bitch to everyone I knew. It was easier not communicating with others; it was easier living in my own little world. Where it was my family, close friends, and my organization, now I’m trying in include my co-workers, clients, old friends, classmates, and those who don’t even play a role in my life. I want to give up on allowing myself to be outgoing; I want to give up on making new friends. I have a gut feeling that some people are taking my actions to another level, when it’s simple as friends. I been adjusted to my own group of friends therefore, I wouldn’t know if I am giving too much or too little of me. Usually, I maintain contact with my group every other day and lately, I swear 3 dudes are getting the wrong idea. I’m not fucking good at making new friends; at least I’m not good at being open. I understand it takes time, but it has been 4 fucking years since I been in this condition and I am fed up with it. I don’t blame anybody but myself for allowing my emotions to control me in the past, I know better now, but now I cannot seem to release any real emotions. I want to give up and step backwards to my safe circle. Sucks, that I don’t get to see them every weekend anymore, everybody is growing up and doing their own thing. Our weekends consist of work, when it orginally consists of each other’s company.